Blissfully Cloudy...

   As a resident of Oman, I have learned from a very young age that one cannot take rain for granted. Ever since my childhood rainy days, heck even slightly cloudy days, have elicited such unique feelings of laziness that I remember them till today. When one grows up in a desert, there are certain things one expects. Sweltering, humid summers and pleasantly chilly winters. Mini-sandstorms and random goats on hill-tops. However, one doesn’t expect snow, rain, hail or any form of precipitation other than morning dew. In fact, rain was so rare in this country, that during my school days, whenever there was the tiniest hint of cloudy skies or even the slightest drizzle, students all across my school would magically awaken from their slumber in mathematics or history classes and then make the same statement over and over again. All through school the line “Can we have a free lesson and go out Ma’am?!” would resonate. Whether one was learning addition in first grade or cursing integration in twelfth, rainy days really united the school.


   Rainy days worked their magic on not only us, mere students, but on the teachers as well (at least some of them.) That one teacher who usually gawked at her class when asked for a free-lesson (“How will we ever finish the syllabus my dear children?!”), was inspired to only teach for forty of the forty-five minutes of her class. The math teacher suddenly started giving the class extremely easy questions to work on. The English teacher encouraged in-class activities such as group discussions. In my personal experience, we discussed Shah-Rukh far more than Shakespeare in these precious spans of time. Yes, rainy days worked their magic on the most stubborn teachers as well.

  Now that global warming is becoming Earth’s new best friend, Oman sees a lot more rainy + cloudy days than it ever did. In fact, when I was away at university, the most unthinkable of things happened in this modest country. School actually got cancelled because of rain. For those of us who have grown up in this particular city and have gone to this particular school, the chances of such an event occurring are like Miley Cyrus getting nominated for an Oscar. It’s simply unthinkable. But behold, such a wondrous event (and I am not referring to Miley’s Oscar dreams) did occur here.

  One particular incident that I can’t help but recall occurred on the last day of my eighth grade. The skies had been particularly cloudy that day, but everyone expected the clouds to just float away to the neighboring cities like they always did (traitors). It was too much to ask really. It was a Wednesday (which signaled weekend) and our final exams had just gotten over (which signaled limitedly unlimited games with friends). And then for it to rain on such a day? Heaven could really be found on Earth!

  However, lunch time came and went and there was not even a drop of rain to be seen. All of us kids reluctantly met at our badminton court to curse the weather gods when the oddest thing happened. One of the boys started accusing us of pelting him with a pebble. Accusations flew around and tempers grew. The situation got worse when another girl screamed in pain when a pebble neatly bounced off her head. It was then that we realized the impossible. It was hailing! The skies were engaging in their own form of ‘badminton’ with us! The rarity of this event caused us to stand flabbergasted on the same spot till one of our mothers started screaming at us to go home. Now under normal circumstances, we would all have gone home, opened our windows and stared wide-eyed at the little heaven-sent rocks we were getting. But come on, it was hailing. How can one expect a normal day with hail in a desert?

  The minute we stepped into the building, as we were waiting for the elevators (and yes, I took the elevator regularly to the first floor. Don’t judge me.), a scream reverberated through the building. A lady was trapped between floors in the elevator! And to top it off, the power in the entire building had gone off with no signs of coming back anytime soon (at this point there was a total downpour occurring outside). To make a long story short, the elevator doors had to be thrust open by firemen (at least I think they were firemen…), the trembling lady was pulled out of a pitch-black elevator loudly declaring her claustrophobia and everyone returned to their darkened flats. The entire incident must have gone on for about two hours. In my homework-doing, exam-cramming life, that day was truly an extraordinary day and absolutely out of the blue. All of us kids met up later that evening, said a quiet thanks to the weather gods for such an exciting day and retired to our normal lives. I say this because the very next day we had such sunny skies that one would have smirked at our stories.

  All in all, rainy days still make me feel extremely at peace. Despite all the various types of weather I endured at university (snowstorms, hurricanes, you name it), rainy days, heck cloudy days, still make me feel like a little child, looking expectantly at the skies, hoping for another extraordinary day.

 * I'd like to dedicate this post to my 'Secret Passage' friends. My childhood wouldn't have been the same without you all. *

Advertisement Arcadium...

Before I delve into my latest blog post, I would like to acknowledge two things-
1) Yes, it has been 10 months since my last post. (You haven't noticed? Oh, that's ok...*sniff*)

2) Culprits are- procrastination, writers block, wondering what to do with my life, panicking because I have no idea what to do with my life and of course, more procrastination.

Anyway, this blog was inspired a string of ridiculous advertisements that have been circulating the television world recently. Some you may have seen, some you may not have. Anywho, I picked five advertisements particularly because these have caught my eye. Hopefully, I can successfully explain to you why. In order to ease your confusion, I have also tried adding the videos to the advertisements right here, so that you can see what you might potentially have been missing out on.

Warning: For those of you busy people with lives, this might just qualify as a 'long' blog post. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Advertisements. They are the tiny 30 second to one or two minute vehicles that companies utilize to spread their message. Advertisements, depending on how you see them, can be entertaining, irritating, smart, dumb or just downright strange. Advertisements cost the companies (at least the really good ones) big bucks. Whether it’s because of the brand or the star that’s endorsing the brand, advertisements today do not come cheap. Of course to us viewers, advertisements are those annoying little pesky things that interrupt the climax of a movie or the punch line of a serial. We have taken these ads for granted for so long that it’s difficult to imagine a life without them. Though mind you, this said life would be infinitely less-annoying for me at least.

 I have to say however, despite my annoyance at these mini-movies (as I like to call them), advertisements have recently become extremely amusing for me. Why? For the first time in my life, I have actually started paying attention to them. Actually listening to what they are saying or offering. No longer am I staring at the TV screen with glazed over eyes, I’m actually seeing and remembering what these ads have to say. One can either blame this on my absolutely stunning attention span (stunningly long or short, you decide) or one can blame this on the fact that I just happen to be watching more TV these days than I have over the last four years. Either way, I have noticed some advertisements over the years that have really stayed with me. These ads are either so ridiculous or so brilliant that I can’t help dedicating a blog to them. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my Advertisement Arcadium-

1) The Matka-Jhatka ad (Hrithik Roshan’s latest Bourbon biscuit ad):

If you have not noticed this one on TV recently, props to you. It’s on after every three ads on Star World or at least it seems that way. The first time I saw it, I didn’t think it was funny. In fact, I was impressed by Hrithik’s ever-flexible jelly legs. (Have you seen the way he moves them?!)

But the next time this ad came on, I was on my back, doubled up with laughter. Here is an incredible actor (Guzaarish was a good movie damnit!) who is doing THE most ridiculous dance steps to advertise a chocolate biscuit! I mean, hey, I love chocolate biscuits as much as the next guy/gal but I am not going to break into such ridiculous dance frenzy if I get one in my hand. Maybe I’d do that dance if I won the lottery and got to marry James Franco, but even that's overstating it.
What I would like to know is, exactly how many hours did the marketing department spend to come up with such an ad? It's like they thought "Hrithik + impossible dance steps = we are rich, rich I tell you!"
And so this ad was born. Some intense hip-thrusting and leg-twisting for a few seconds followed by the line of the decade- ‘Try it’.

I’m not kidding, after all those complex dance moves, that is all Hrithik has to say to advertise the product. And he probably got paid a few lakhs for those words. Wow.

To be honest, I liked the chocolate biscuits dropping into that chocolate sauce in the end. That really appealed to me and whispered delicious cravings into my ear. The rest? Pure hilarious entertainment (unfortunately at Hrithik’s expense).



2) The ever-failing son ad (Centre fresh ad of about a year back)

This ad is actually one of my favorites. I think it’s funny, it gets its point across and it stays with you. Unfortunately, it didn’t make me run out and buy a centrefresh but it’s still a pretty good ad. I personally think that companies have a higher chance of success with funny ads. Anyway, this ad is about a boy who tries to outsmart his father only to be outsmarted himself. What really had me in splits was the boy’s accent and attitude. He comes in with such pride only to tell his father “Papa mein phir se phail ho gaya” or ‘Dad, I’ve failed yet again’. Notice the way he guffaws at his father after that. Notice that all other workers around them have gone silent. Notice the rapidity of the dad’s hand movement. Notice how the voiceover in the end sums up the entire ad. All in all, this ad is pure comical genius.





3) The random gift ad (Buy a blah and get a blah free ad)

Unfortunately, my sister and I seem to be the only ones who thought this ad was funny enough to find it online. Youtube has finally failed me.

Quite honestly, I didn’t notice anything about this ad till my sister pointed it out to me. Notice in the end, on the woman’s tray, all the products that are there. Amongst all the unisexual products (and you will understand why I call them unisexual in a moment), there is a Whispers packet. No joke. It’s just sitting there, chilling with the other products. The whole point of this ad was that during Diwali, if one bought something, say a shampoo, one would get some useful household object like washing powder free. Truly a good marketing strategy. Who doesn’t like free stuff?!

 Now I don’t know how this works, but I don’t think one can choose what one wants free. It just comes with whatever you buy. So you buy a shampoo and whether you like it or not, you have to take home some washing powder. So say that particular Whispers packet was attached to some really useful product, like dish washing liquid or a light bulb or something. Imagine a bachelor going out to his nearby store, with just a few rupees in his pocket. He desperately needs that light bulb and all that store has is this unique offer of a light bulb free with a Whispers packet. What a nasty surprise. Now he has to buy something he does not need just to get something he needs. Of course, he can buy a bulb separately but hey, it’s cheaper with the offer! Clearly the person running this company has a soft spot for women. Good for us girls, hilariously awkward for the boys.



4) The ‘don’t-you-like surprises’ ad (Aamir Khan’s watch ad)

This was a good ad, in my opinion. Classy, short and direct. Quite frankly, I don’t have anything to point out in this ad. However, my sister and I were discussing the tag line- ‘Why? Don’t you like surprises?’ and the eagerness of the girl to dance around with Aamir, when we realized the girl seems to be a tad bit gullible. Firstly, she’s on a blind date. Secondly, a random stranger who is not the random stranger she was supposed to meet comes up and offers to dance with her. Thirdly, she knows that he’s someone else and still decides to dance around with him. However, she saves her dignity by outwitting him in the end (apparently) and throwing his own silly pick-up line back at him. She is obviously charmed by the guy or else she would never have given him so much attention. Now imagine this. After drinks and dancing, the couple go towards the secluded car parking area.

Guy: Let’s go for dinner.

Girl: Awesome. Here, let me take out my car keys while obviously showcasing my new shiny watch to the world.

Guy snatches her purse and runs away.

Girl: Hey!! What’s going on?!

Guy: Why? Don’t you like surprises? (Runs away clutching the bag, laughing maniacally)

[Moral: Stay away from strangers kids!]

It’s a totally plausible scenario. At least in my head it is. Either way, a good ad with hilarious after-thoughts.




5) The ‘I’m-being-a-paranoid-moron’ coffee ad (Deepika Padukone Nescafe ad storyline)

This video is the 3rd of the 4 part series. I picked this one because I think Deepika actually acted well for the first time in her life (accidentally or not you decide).

This ad, I believe has garnered quite a bit of attention. Either it’s because of Miss Long Legs actually looking a bit healthier than she usually does or because of the latest Koffee with Karan sponsorship that the ad has. Either way, the ad is shot as a storyline of some sort with this incredibly rich (he has to be rich to live in the same apartment complex as Deepika, unless Deepika is supremely modest), unknown boy who happens to be Deepika’s neighbor.

He is intimidated by her. She assumes him to be some sort of ‘psycho’ (her own words). They both drink coffee (or should I say Koffee), and immediately become ultra-realistic. What results is a budding friendship only to be interrupted by a ‘super-fabulous’, stuck-up Karan Johar.

The reason I am bringing this ad up is to highlight this whole ‘storyline’ business that has sneaked its way into advertisements. It started with the Priyanka Chopra- Saif Ali Khan Pond’s White Beauty ad a couple of years ago. The ads themselves become mini-serials of some sort. However, the episodic form of the Nescafe and Ponds ad is as far as their similarities go. While the Nescafe ad is cute and silly, the Ponds ad was just plain annoying. Its main idea was “Become fair or else you will never get the love of your life because everyone knows men go for the fair-skinned ones”. Really? Since then, it’s pretty much been a barrage of ‘become-as-white-as-MJ-was’ products with each company coming out with its own fairness cream.

Anyhow, my main point is, ads are special because they force companies to highlight their products in sixty seconds or less. To be able to catch the audience’s attention in such a short span of time and keep the ad in the audience’s mind unleashes all forms of creativity. But when ads decide to become like TV serials with three to four ads utilizing Bollywood star power to get their point across, I can’t help but feel that the magic of ads is being compromised. For me, a sixty second ad, sans big stars, but with a powerful message is much more impressive than mini-TV serials that hark on and on, on the same topic. Prime example- Vodafone ads. Genius to the power of infinity.


Well, either way, ads are ads are ads at the end of the day. Regardless of how mind-numbingly terrible some can be, they deserved at least one blog post here.
As David Ogilvy (a famous person famous for something) once said - A good advertisement is one which sells the product without drawing attention to itself.


I have a feeling this statement holds no more.